Friday, December 28, 2007

Rose Parade craziness!

So it is the 28th of December. And I have just spent 15.5 hours shooting 'The Making of Rose Parade 2008' special for HGTV. Wow, it was COLD! Now some of you know this is my 2nd year shooting this special, and even though I have experienced the pain of the cold in the 'float barns', I still am unable to convince myself to stop physically abusing my body by dressing in a silk dress in weather that hits the highs of the 40's all day long. Damn! It was some cold stuff! Now senseless as I am, I find the prettiest little silk dress and think the flower motif will be great for the special. Yeah. So I find some tank tops, double them up and like a lady, tuck them deep into my hot pink colored tights. This my friends, is one sexy look. It gets even better when the microphone, ever so important when you decide to record moving picture with a crazy thing called sound, gets pulled under my tanks. this ruins the whole tuck for warmth idea. Plus, the mic pack gets taped to my upper thigh. And when I say upper thigh, I mean the place that the priest touches you when he wants to be your friend. All day long guys, the sound man, nice person, keeps having to strap and restrap the pack to my upper thigh, and in doing so, I flash him more than enough shots of my hot pink colored crotch. I was wearing tights! I don't think he expected to have his retinas burnt out that day, but I hear the company has good workman's comp, so I don't feel so bad. He'll be the only sound guy deaf in both eyes.

So now I am headed BACK to the float barns to tour the floats prior to them hitting Colorado Blvd. this New Year's. And that means another 7 am call time. I love this stuff, so I totally don't mind much. Or I could just totally be lying because the morning sun feels like the sting of of a vicious pit bull attack on my jugular. Anyhow, I will be joining the live commercial-free team coverage of the parade again this year in pasadena, bright and early on New year's morning! I LOVE this stuff! I love the flowers. I love the floats. I love the pageantry. And I love never having to make plans and go out on New year's Eve. :) That's the best part!

Watch it Tuesday morning. And 'Making of' special will be on HGTV right before. If you're not up, set the tivo.

Chat soon.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Merry Christmas

hey you all! Happy holidays!

Now there are sooo many things to discuss, I have to somehow shave it down to just a few bullet points because I have to run.

1. chocolate - I did a 'sin is in' Sweets shoot for CW NOW. And what did I do for 5.5 hours friday before xmas? I went to 4 locations all throughout Los Angeles, and gorged myself on chocolate. That's right. I ate some sweet, delicious, hand crafted truffles. They were amazing, all with interesting 'juxtapositions of flavor profiles' (look at me go!) like smoked sea salt and 7 Japanese Spices on top of hand crafted chocolates. Comparte is where I ate probably around 7,000 truffle chocolates. It was on Barrington in LA. And not only was I eating my way to obesity at this joint, but my camera crew and I decided we needed some excitement in the form of 'I Dare You's. What did we do? It's kind of an innocuous game when played at work, so my challenge was to get the chocolatier to say 'karate' without asking him to say it outright, nor telling him of the game. Now we all know I am klassy with a 'k' and as smooth as Rico Suave, so what do I do? Well I wait until he is helping these two lovely ladies at the register get their chosen morsels of goodness and then I break out into 3rd degree questioning about that movie, you know, that Ralph Machio became famous in? And who was that great Japanese Actor? Ray, Jay? Oh, and what was that martial art he practiced? It was kung-fu huh? wasn't it? Now sure I sounded like a complete idiot, but friends, let me just say, I won! What you may ask, did I get for my small triumph on behalf of mankind? Well, as my cameraman says, I get 'one point.' I felt more ripped off than when I paid full price for a ticket to see "Men in Black 2'. Anyhow, long story short, I went to 4 places, ate at 4 places, and got sick to my stomach for 2 days! Most women would have died to me in my position. Me? When my producer asked me to have just one more piece, I shot her a stink eye so bad, I think she bathed in tomato juice that night. My bad. Crazy as it was, I totally enjoyed myself. Plus I got to hang with 'Food Dude' Kevin Roberts who loves food more than I do! And he edumakated me on some stuff! It was fun!

2. I will be hosting the Rose Parade 2008 and the 'Making of Rose Parade 2008' again this year! Yeah! Now you all know I am absolutely looney so when they ask me to come and talk about flowers, it is honestly the only thing i can think about for months on end! I absolutely LOVE the Rose Parade and the floats! Plus all the controversy over the China and Beijing Olympics floats. Jeez guys, it's just a bunch of flowers and seeds on papier mache. Are protesters with signs necessary? Anyhow, my call time for these two awesome projects? Oh, a lovely 5 and and 4 am! Yeehaw! I cannot wait! You can watch them both on New Year's Day 2008 on HGTV. I believe the party starts around 6 am, so set your coffee maker.

3. I hope you all had wonderful holidays and got everything you asked Santa for this year. Hugs.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

On the road to better skin

Not like I have ever been told, 'wooooh, there lady! you need yourself a face lift!' But when CW NOW requested that I put my money maker aka. face up to be poked, prodded, polished, creamed, pulled, lasered, and more all in the name of good tv! Woot.

So being a sensible woman in my twonties, I thought, why not give it a go? I have never really been to a dermatologist...ok, that is a complete lie. Once I went into my doctor's office because I had Mt,. Vesuvious about to blow on my face, and I thought, even though I was just a producer tehn, this cannot be humanly possible. I cannot stand to live in a world where my face is the playground for volcanic zits. GAWD. Oh wait, where was i going? oh right. So i got a referral to a dermatologist to see this one zit. And when I went back to my doctor, she said, 'i cannot believe the doctor who was seeing you while I was on maternity leave referred you to a dermatologist. it was a zit.' Thanks lady.

Anyhoo, back to this visit to a famous Beverly Hills doctor. His name is Dr. Lancer, and he is known as the dude who gives a lot of the A-listers in LA their glow on teh red carpet. Supposedly his clients include Beyonce, Kate Hudson, Denise Richards, and some other people. As the in-depth reporter I am, I decide to go to the doctor's office and havce him perform some of the 'maintenance work' he performs on the stars to let them glow while they flow down the red carpet. This included Micropolishing, Matrix IR laser treatment, and an oxygen and placenta facial.

Let's start with Micropolishing. Now remember, during the entire 1.5 hours or so of these treatments, I am on camera the entire time, and I have to look like i am having a ball! And most of the time I am, until it comes to poking. So Micropolishing. Micropolishing is like microdermabrasion, where the doctor goes in with a device and exfoliates the dead cells off your face. Dr. Lancer's little tool was different. when you look at it, you see a polisher that looks much like the device a dentist uses to polish your teeth when you go in for your cleanings. Now instead of this little bristle at the end of the device, imagine a tiny suction cup with a little bit of crystal in there and comes out at the suction cup sucks your skin into the head of the device. That's right. So the doctor asks me what it felt like. I wanted to say, well it feels like one of those sucker fish I used to have in my fish tank went out into the world, fell in love with a barracuda, had little sucky toothed babies, and that baby found my face and started teaching me a lesson. But since there are cameras on me, I said, 'It feels interesting, like a little suction and I can feel something polishing my skin.' Consumate professional is my middle name. ;)

Now for the Matrix IR laser. Dr. Lancer was kind enough to note that my skin was pretty healthy and tone and in 30 or so years, I will not have to worry about huge wrinkles. YES! Thank you mom for the good genes. But to show off his 'star treatment,' I underwent a laser treatment anyhow. And on that note, have you ever noticed how 'laser' is very similar to 'taser'? Yup. Well lemme tell you something, being close to naked with one of those flimsy paper gowns on, but still wearing my cowboy boots, I don't even know, please don't ask, I was lying on my back as Dr. Lancer starts putting all this jelly, which he so sweetly describes as 'Just like KY Jelly'. I swear to god! What woman wants to hear that her doctor is gonna squirt a sexual lubricant on her face after he puts a little blindfold on her?!!!!?! So he squirts all this jelly on my face, then continues to rub it in. And then a question gets asked. Dude! That jelly got really close to my mouth and when i had to TALK, it went in!!!!! IN!!!!! aaarrrggghhhhh! And then the 'treatment' begins. So he puts this laser on my face and runs it around while shooting these little tiny pulses of light onto my face. How does it feel? Honestly, it was kinda uncomfortable. It was as if someone was using a very low wattage shocker on my skin. It was not totally crazy, but I like to think I blow things way out of proportion and that is what makes my life exciting. Honestly, when they asked me how it felt, all I could think was, 'Man, no wonder laser rhymes with taser.'

And then came the oxygen and placenta masks. Now oxygen mask is no big deal, they take this little beaker thingie filled with clean oxygen and gently blow it on my face. It was really relaxing actually, since I was lying comfortably down on a large lounger and there was a heating pad on my lower back. They do know how to treat a girl! And then it ended. Now comes the placenta! So the aestetician takes out the jar of stuff and starts smearing it on my face, saying the placenta is really healthy and hydrating for my skin. Great. My only question, where does this placenta come from? Cows? Dogs? Chickens? She says, 'humans.' My first thought, 'OMG are there just people who troll the hospitals and once a baby is born, they do a knee slide into the delivery room with a pan in hand to catch the placenta?' But being a lady and on camera, I keep these thoughts to myself. Or at least to myself until the camera turns off and I start to type. hello! :) So after finding out that this is human placenta, culled in an FDA approved lab, and worth a lot of money, I am still a little uncomfortable, but getting ok with the idea of having human detritus purposely smeared onto my face. Then she gets it close to my mouth. OMG. I must have kicked a kitten in a previous life to have this happen. Do you know where placenta comes from? Starbucks doesn't use it as a coffee flavoring, so could we not give Chi-Lan the taste sensation?! Anyhow, after freaking out all in my head and laughing about how the placenta was peeling on my face after we finish the facial, I have ot say, I was feeling quite moisturized and glowy. :)

Whatever that doctor did seemed to work, as I didn't look like crap. And you can see the story on CW NOW this Sunday. Check it yo! Then holler back.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Unusual Bruises

You ever just wake up in the morning and think, OUCH! Damn! What the hell happened and why does the top of my shoulder feel so bruised? Those my friends are the markings of a good holiday party. That's right. CW NOW had their holiday party over the weekend and it was open bar. Hello, that is the only language I speak when I am out and about. So...everyone was there, every producer, assistant, exec, PA, everyone. And I was partaking in my slight share of the freeflowing of drinks. I kept it light and ladylike with what I call 'bellinis' (hold pinky up when saying this to get the full effect), champagne topped with a splash of cranberry, because honestly, who knows what label of bubbly they're packing back there. For all I know, the champagne could have the soul of Nick Nolte in his DUI picture, but with a splash of juice, it sings like Whitney Houston before Bobby Brown.

Did I ever tell you about the time I woke up with the WORST headache in San Francisco? I was visiting some old friends after I had moved down and was staying at a hotel at the Wharf. Well I wake up to this banging headache, thinking, wow, did I really drink that much? I thought my lush days were done and done. Then after begging the bellman to bring me up some aspirin, and as my bitch of a friend, also hung over, just moaned and made me fetch the pills from the door, I finally jumped in the shower and decided to wash my hair. Yes, the memory is that vivid. Anyhoo, as I am washing, I touch the back of my head as I am scrubbing, and I let out the most volatile scream since Janet Lee in Psycho. I swear I heard wolves holler back at a girl. Now how the hell did the back of my skull be pounced on so bad? I don't remember getting punched. As I explained to my friend sleeping in the bed next to me about my weird head thing, he said, you don't remember? You got into a fight with a door. And then it all came rushing back. That damn door knob was giving me the evil eye and I needed to show it a lesson. After a small tangle with the wine cube at my friend's place, I decided the door needed to be taken down a notch, and boom! Door knob, meet my head, head meet the door knob.

Oh back to my holiday party story, so much debauchery to speak of but I am late for work. So I have to run. I am working the premiere of Charlie Wilson's War, a funny political story about one man who didn't seem so good at his job, doing great things in his position. and it wasn;t in the lateral position either! Although he was known for that. Did that joke make it anywhere? anyone, anyone, bueller?

Sunday, December 09, 2007

For some reason, the paint never stopped flowing

I swear to god, this Friday and Saturday I helped my mom paint her bedroom and then trim and touch-ups Saturday. Now this is on top of the weekend from painting hell and an additional weekend of painting more stuff, including the chairs, shrubs, flowers, rails, tiles, nails, cough medicine bottles, aspirin, and anything else that can be primed. GAWD! It has gotten to the sad point where I spend most all my free time at Lowes or Home Depot getting materials during the work week only to look oh so forward to glory of the painting weekend. I've convinced myself all this painting is cardio and can stand in for the gym. No bones about it!

Anyhow, has anyone evcer gotten such a bad case of the cankles your shoes don't fit on your feet any longer? Well it happened to me. If I were in the Family Guy episode where Bill Clinton takes his harem of large ladies out on the town, my canckles would woo Clinton so bad, he'd forget all about those 20 year old interns. So because I can't stand being awake and for about 14 hours on a plane in coach, I decided to take matters in my own hands and take a sleeping pill to make them hours just fly away. And fly they did, but as they flew, they somehow inserted about 10 gallons of water into my ankles. This is how it happened. I wake up after sleeping for a good 6-7 hours. I try and insert my 'hmmm my ankles look a little puffy and unusual' feet into my sandles. Let's just say that I wasn't able to shove my feet into my sandles to make it to the bathroom. Even with grease, these whales would not have made it into these shoes. So what do I do? I end up going to the bathroom in socks - no hard soles. And the first thing I do when I get into the bathroom? Look for sprinkles, and I ain't talking about cupcakes.

So Thailand was amazing. What did I do for the wonderous three days? Well the most important thing to know is once I found out that massages are all of $6, I got as many as I possibly could. And I scored 4 of them! bravo Chi-Lan. Ok, so we shot for the first two days non-stop, talking about all the fun things Thailand had to offer, then off to Ko Pha Ngan for the Full Moon Party (insert drum and bass music here). And that party was sooo great! I didn't get to enjoy much of it honestly because I had to work - a lot - but I did get enough time to dance with some guys I met that are from Las Vegas, explore some of the drink stands and walk down the beach. Great! Can I just say that I love the fact that as kids on the beach, we play non-stop with pails. Well at the biggest beach party in the world in Thailand, adults drink their juice out of the pails. How crazy is it to see all these adults, a few of whom are shirtless (thank you big guy in the sky), carrying around little alcoholic buckets with colorfull bendy straws. And there was even this one Irish lad who saw the simple problem of holding these little pails and walking, not being able to easily being able to sip, so he connected 5 bendy straws to be able to walk and lounge but always have the straw right in tongue reach. I guess bending the elbow to bring the bucket o' alcohol would be too much work.

And now I can get down to business. Baja Fresh. Now I am a huge fan of Mexican food, and really do like to eat Baja even if it isn't real Mexican. But hey, it's good. Or at least I thought. Baja, you bitch. you have wronged the wrong girl. so I have eaten twice at Baja recently, ready to partake in the fine dining that is adulterated mexican in california. Little did I realize that I would be paying for the solidified diareehea (yes I am a word smith) that is coming from my once loved chain restaurant. Now I know that this has all been 'to-go' orders but still. I ordered a tostada without chicken, because, well I don't eat meat. So what do I get? i get a tostada, and no, I didn't add chicken. What do I get instead? I get a tostada, but what are those little bits of white thready sh*%? Wow, chicken. And all the wonderful Baja dude did was slap some chicken into the dish, realize it isn't supposed to have chicken and like a responsible and sensible man, the just takes the chicken off. Great dude. Thanks ot you and your mom for raising you. I can see her efforts were not wasted on just a bag of skin. So last week I decide to give my old Baja another go at winning back my heart with an order of my usual salad and what do I get? Well as a friend who saw my salad said, 'what the f*ck is that? There's only lettuce.' Yup, my salad only had lettuce. I am not sure what happened to the beans, rice, cheese, dressing, etc., but I did specifically taste teh bitterness of life wielded into the plastic container by a short order cook that really hates the world who can't order meat thrown haphazardly into a tortilla. That's it. I don't want to live in a world where I can't get a good tostada. But then again, I think I should just stop going to Baja Fresh. Make me waste $6 once Baja, shame on you, make me waste $12, shame on me. You guys been feeling all that rain? It's god crying because Baja sucks so bad.

Monday, November 19, 2007

The weekend that must not be named

This weekend was an amazing exercise of a daughter's love for her mom - and improving her mom's house. Yes, this was the weekend my brain had a huge fart when my mom asked, 'so...whacha doin' this weekend?' Response didn't come in time, so my mom continues 'looks like we're painting!'

And we did paint! I spent Friday mainly at Home Depot with the mother unit buying all necessary materials. And this was pretty fun, I have -

bitch! Did that just happen? Can I just say that I never get manicures and that's because I always screw it up? And right after I decide to treat myself and get one, my nail gets stuck underneath a keyboard KEY! WTF? Does this happen to anyone else? gawd!

Where was I? Yes, Home Depot. Oh how I love home improvement stores, I am not sure of the day, but it was such an amazing feeling to walk into Lowe's back in the day, look around and realize, I know where to get almost everything! And theoretically, I can tackle any home project. In practice, that's another story.

So painting of my mom's living room, kitchen, hallway and bathroom was a two-day endeavor that called upon spirits that I have not seen in a long time. Namely my XL YMCA t-shirt from my teen years as a desk clerk. That ugly ass shirt takes me back to days when old guys in their mid to late 40s (remember, I was 16, anyone over 23 was OLD) came into the Y everyday to sweat off their stress. And it got gamey in there after 6 pm, and not in a sexy dorm room gamey either. There was this one guy that was totally ripped and old, always with a beard, red workout shorts, and a tight wife beater type workout tank. And everyday he came in, we'd have to stop rocking out to whatever station I wanted to listen to and make me switch to the oldies station. Wow, sweatin' to the oldies has morphed into a lifestyle that transcends curly-haired freaks. But I have to admit, after listening to so many oldies, I do switch to those stations pretty frequently while in the car. God works in strange ways.

My dad, mom, sister, brother and I joined forces to tackle this painting project that took a lot more brute strength than I expected. Now let it be known that I work out fairly frequently, but nothing prepared my body, equipped with the upper arm-strength of a small bird, for all this waving up and down of a paint roller. Ralph Machio would have been a world class fighter had he come over this weekend. That much I know.

We painted everyday for about 9 hours daily and quit when the light went away. At this point, my brother was calling for my mom to head to Home Depot and hire some day workers to finish the rest of the project. But he and I know my mom don't play that. She has 3 kids, and I am sure in her opinion, all those hours of labor are more than enough payment for a few measly days of painting. So my sister bought dinner too. I hope we're even.

Now I am sitting on the couch with my dog, watching 'Big Idea with Donny Deutsch'. Why? Well because somehow I came down with a weird stomach pain thing that I cannot get over, so I decided to take it easy. Maybe I will take a couple miles walk. This is also the part of the year I love, when the air gets a little chilly, crisp, a brisk 61 degrees. That’s right. Sixty-one degrees. And that is cold to me. Sure I’ll need to suit up appropriately, like with a fleece, scarf and long pants, but hey, I am a trooper. My dog, my walking partner, is not. He will fight me and fight me and fight me. Running under that table, into his kennel, anywhere he can run and hide to escape from his outside sweater and a walk that will chill his itty-bitty organs to the cellular level! Yes!

And even though I am not feeling so hot in the belly arena, I am dreaming of pie. Pie. Pie!!!!

PS. Headed to Thailand over thanksgiving for CW NOW. I am just staying in Ko Samui and hitting up the Full Moon Party. Woohoo! Get ready for some crazy stories!

Wednesday, November 07, 2007


So....did anyone actually see my segment on Costa Rica on CW NOW? Otherwise, check out the online version. And let me know what you think.

Ok so my next little adventure involves this crazy new fitness craze (as we're calling it) Parkour. Now many of you may know what it is, and many of you may not. Parkour is the sibling to Free Running, which is to move as smoothly and fluidly as possible past all obstacles...Parkour is a little different. It deals more with moving as quickly and efficiently as possible from point A to B. That means instead of creating a beatuiful seamless fluid movement, Parkour makes you jump, vault, run and leap over obstacles so you can catch that bus!

It started in Europe and now is making a huge splash especially among the females in the emerald city, Seattle. So I went up to Seattle to kick some Parkour ass. And let me tell you, as much as I practiced rolling, landing, vaulting, etc., all those things made me incredibly sore and tired. And as simple as each activity looks on TV, it ain't folks. And did I mention how i love that in most of the world, people call this Parkour, my friends and I in Los Angeles just call it running from the cops. Too true a look into my personal life? Hmmmm...

I love the girl I met...she is spearheading the Parkour movement in Seattle, Janine Cundy. She's young, hip, and makes huge blueberry pancake breakfasts for up to 50 girls who go and train on the weekends. She took me out to the odd yet gorgeous Gas Works Park in Seattle to show me the ropes. I, a journalist of questionable ground, think to myself, huh 'show me the ropes' means she'll perform some of the movements and I will take it in, like a reporter. Well no, I'm not getting off that easy. Being a scaredy-cat daredevil aka. totally chicken shit adventurer, I decide I really want to try parkour. She starts me off with landings. Sure. totally rock that. Then rolls. Ok, how? Just roll onto your neck, throw your body over as you reach for the sun. Wha????? You want me to roll and break my neck while I reach for the sky and say hello to the sun? why do I always have to make the first move with the sun? why can't he step up and be a man? GAWD, the single life is so hard.

Anyhow, after finally rolling on my neck and realizing I am not made of glass, I start rolling like a crazy woman all over the grass, unaware that the patch of greenery we chose is also the choice green for geese to come and excrete all that delicious fecal matter. Woot. Parkour is already starting to be great!

Then we get to vaulting. And I swear to god, I vaulted over a cement divider that is about 10 inches wide and hip high about 89 times - and only caught air once. The vault plan? Well, as Janine so kindly explains, just jump up and take your legs over your body. To give you more momentum to get your body weight over the divider, 'aim your face for the ground'. Oh, is that all it is? Aim my face at the ground? easy breezy. My response? 'you want me to aim my money-maker at the what?!'. Janine found this entertaining. She also asked me to join her as she jumped over a second story stairwell and slid down a 10 foot wall. She demos and says, 'now you go.' Huh. What did I say? 'I'm totally good. You slide, I'll just use the stairs. That works. Parkour for Chi-Lan!

All in all, Parkour is a huge mind-game as well as physical play, IMHO. You have to remember how you used to play as a kid, remember what it felt like to try things because you are invincible, and realize that your body can do things that it hasn't done if you try. And as sore as I ended up being the next day, there are many a rail that I pass daily thinking 'Man, I can totally just jump over that.' I have to admit, I am hooked. And I will continue to aim my face at the floor. One question - why can't parkour involve aiming your ass at the floor instead? doesn't that seem more reasonable? Go ahead - discuss.

watch the segment on CW NOW Sunday at 7 on the CW.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Costa Rica!!!!

Hello loyal readers!

I know, since I post all of once a month, it isn't fair for me to expect you guys to tune into CW NOW this Sunday to catch my two pieces on Costa Rica, the ultimate tropical paradise! But come on! Check it out. I am in a bathing suit during much of it, it is so nice and warm in that country.

So why have I not posted in over a month? Well besides my inability to sit still and type for over 5 minutes, it's because October - December, I, luckily, and really busy...In October alone, I was home all of about 1.5 weeks. Yeah!

So what have I been doing in the spooky month of October? Well besides trying to manage my crazy vicious dog, Moose, who btw, is getting a lot better with commands, I have been traveling a lot. Most recently I went to my semi-hometown of San Francisco, where I shot much of my HGTV special, '20 ways to live a greener home' or something to that effect. During this shooting, I fell in love with a pre-fab home designed by architect Ray Kappe. Can you tell I am a total modernist at heart? I am all about pre-fab housing where your house is built in some factory and then pieced together on-site. now just because I am in love with it, doesn't mean my wallet is allowing me to have it. Pre-fab housing, as much as I want it, it is still kind of out of reach for a girl like me in Southern California...come to think of it, a parking space is kinda out of reach for a girl like me in Southern Califormia. Damn it!

Ok, so Costa Rica! Wow, how awesome was that trip. Now if you follow CW NOW, you know my fellow correspondent is J Boogie, and he and I were originally designated to go together. Now at the last minute, the powers that be decided that Costa Rica was more 'Costa Chica' so they decided to just send me instead of us both. I felt really bad for Boogie as he really wanted to go, but now he may head to Moscow, so he didn't lose out too much. :)

As for Costa Rica, it is a magical place, humid, but magical. I, being of the warm blooded type that can only handle 75 degree weather, I didn't suffer too much with Costa Rica's heat. But then again, it was the rainy season and the humidity in the highlands were at bay. Yeah! So if you'll indulge me, this is the breakdown of my five day trip to Costa Rica. Did you hear that? I think Fergie just started singing my theme song 'Glamour-ous'. Ok not really...I'll just go sit over there.

My 5 day crazy extravaganza to and through Costa Rica started with an early AM flight from LA connecting through Miami, arriving in San Jose at 7:45 pm. Now I know most of you are like, 'girl, do you have any idea about geography? why are you going east just o go west again?' Good question teacher's pet. But let me tell you, airlines aren't exactly the most sensible people in the world, and the people of American are not exactly 'on it.' Case in point...So all the flights leave on time, so I assume we will land in Costa Rica on time. Flights have been fine thus far, but as we approach San Jose, the pilot tells us there is some thick fog that is blocking view of the runway and we cannot land. So the guy decides to circle like a vulture for about an hour. Hmmm...ok. Then I notice the lights of the city seem to be getting further and further away. Pilot finally comes on the PA system and tells us we have to be rerouted to Panama City, Panama for the night. WHAAAA????!!!!!!! Considering we were supposed to drive 3 hours away to our first location that night to start shooting at 7 am the next morning, what are we gonna do? The answer? Absolutely nothing. Can I really move a 747 or force transport of 400 people? nah. wouldn't want to intimidate all the people on the plane with my awe inspiring strength. Now if Murphy's Law wasn't just making sure I knew it was there to kick my ass, as soon as we land in Panama City, the weather clears up and the pilot asks everyone to stay put as he will fly us back once we gas up. Secret I learned since I got to sit up front and make friends with the pilot and attendants, we were low on gas!!!!! HOLY CRAP! Ok, so gassing back up and getting the 'maintenance log' for the plane takes all of 2 hours - imagine this, hundereds of people on a pretty large plane are stuck seated. A couple can get up and walk to the front of the plane where the front door is open for some air, but otherwise, nothing. And on top of no fresh air and no circulation, they run out of all supplies. I am talking water, liquids, snacks, everything! An older Asian man walks up to ask for something to drink and all they can give him are two half filled plastic glasses of (drum roll) ice! Crazy! So after waiting waaaayyyy too long on the tarmac, we finally fly off to San Jose and land! Yeah! Now that incredible ordeal on American lasted a good 16 hours. Let it be known that a direct flight takes all of 5.5 hours. As Yoda would say, pissed I was.

Anyhow, after a cab driver who works on commission from hotels gets 4 Americans (my crew and myself) to accept a hotel for the night at his preferred clean and cheap hotel, we finally get to rest. Little did he tell us, he was taking us straight into the red light district, the trannie red light district. How did he know out of all the places, that's where I'd feel most comfortable? It's like he was reading my mind....

We sleep for all of three hours and get into the car for a long ass car ride to a gorgeous spot in the highlands of Costa Rica, La Furtuna and Tabacon Spa and Resort. Once we get here, all the crap from traveling gets washed away as we look out and see this gorgeous awe-inspiring still active volcano, Arenal, and see the lush rainforest surrounding us. Now Tabacon is a five star resort that doesn't fool around. The entire hot springs is lush, green and the steam rising from each of the different pools was incredibly impressive. Then we walked through the spa treatment rooms. Now when one thinks of spas, white wall and complete silence is what comes to mind. Well not here. All the treatment rooms and yoga center are situated in the rainforest, with all the rooms' four walls open so you clearly interact with the rainforest. You hear the animals, insects and feel the wind and fresh air on you as you are being indulged in whatever treatment you choose. This experience of just seeing this area and frolicking in the hot springs made the day of travel kind of manageable.

Next morning we headed into a canyon to go canyoning. This activity allows you to move through a canyon by hiking and rappelling, and was crazy fun! Now being slightly afraid of heights, it was an experience to be told first and foremost, this is a 165 foot drop. Wha?!!???!!!! No one told me this. And since we hiked there and I couldn't turn back, that and there was a camera on my face the entire time, it was kind of hard for me to say, 'I'm good this round. go on without me. next time for sure.' Also, once thing I noticed is that Costa Ricans don't really care to 'ease' you into anything. The tallest rappel down a waterfall was my first. There were 4 more. Really? you couldn't set a sister up with a 65 footer first? 100 footer, even! Anyhow, I am glad I decided to say fuggetaboutit and get my harness hooked up and took the plunge. Now being not the heaviest participant and it being my first time at the rappel, it was hard to figure out how to get the weight to start pulling me down the rope. Gravity was giving me the finger during this first rappel. He obviously wanted me to look like an ass on TV. You win this round gravity. So soon I had to start pulling the rope up so my body could slip down. Crazy! And after two runs or so, we encountered a waterfall that really wanted to make us all wet. And it did. We rappelled straight into a waterfall, making for good wet t-shirt contest entrants. And let's not forget the sneakers. Because if there is one thing I absolutely love, it's walking in soaking wet sneakers. Yes!

After beautiful waterfalls in the AM, let's talk about the PM. Did I wrong Murphy's Law in another life? Anyhow, we started driving to get to Jaco, a beach town and our next location at a good hour after caonyoning. What should have been a 3-4 hour drive turned out to be a 6 hour ordeal in a rainstorm, which ended in us knocking on the door of a private apartment hotel (popular in that area of Playa Hermosa). Now it would not have been so bad had the matron of the apartment hotel not been a complete and total 'security-guard-drunk-with-power-of-a-sewn-on-badge-and-plastic-baton.' You know what I'm talking about....anyhow, this woman, who we ended up calling 'Militant Millicent' wore only bathing suit bottoms and a t-shirt, didn't really welcome us. Rather, she showed us our barren rooms, which we were expected to share. And please note, I am the only girl and I had just spent the last 6 hours in a CAR with 3 GUYS. I needed my own space, but was cool. I didn't say anything...but my sound man, being a chivalrous man, jumped to my defense saying I needed a private residence, at which point, i think I saw Militant Millicent's head slowly start to release steam through the ears and her head almost explode. Lovely!

So what was the first thing I learned about lovely Jaco Beach while there? well I learned that is is almost solely known as a 'working girl's town' and an overdeveloped beach town. ok, win win is what I am hearing. That would explain all the signs telling me not to invite prostitutes into the hotel which is family friendly. Damn, wish I would have seen that sign sooner. I wonder if she gives refunds.

So what else did I do? What about zip lining through the chicklet trees, releasing sea turtles into the ocean and taking a surf lesson? That's right. I fit about a week's worth of activity into 3 days. Lemme tell you, I am still exhausted. But I loved sending those little sea turtles out to the ocean. Seeing them move to the water really makes me realize how in tune with mother nature all beings are, except us...I didn't know the baby sea turtles were born that morning, but the vultures circling above knew right from the get go. Damn.

Long story short, as long as we were traveling, like from one location to another, in wheels, with wings, whatever, it was pretty much the most torturous time of my time in this foreign country, but afterwards, it was pure paradise - on 4 hours sleep nightly. Costa Rica was a great experience. But not cheap, unless you REALLY try. My emotional high? the itty bitty sea turtles! They were so extra cute! they made me want to get a black mini cooper. :)

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

And if you'll indulge me, I have to tell you about my first 'Red Carpet' and Britney underwear experience. First off, I know many of the readers of this blog are of the XX chromosome group, so I am not sure why I am gonna talk about heels and underwear, but then again, I should ask why you're reading this SIR! :0)

Anyhow, today I did a story on the up and coming designer Jenni Kayne. Her clothes are carried in a store called Intermix, which opened tonight in Los Angeles. After showing off her Fall 2007 line, she dressed me for said store opening, and I am to walk the red carpet. Flash forward to 7 pm, I arrive all dolled up in a fairly expensive and somehow increasingly short hemmed black minidress. Sure it is a beautiful short frock with patent leather piping on the edges, but when I sat down in the car, duuuude, i almost saw my hip bone. Not only that, but being the graceful and ever vigilant Chinese driver I am, I pull up to the valet thinking I can turn it into the driveway, and have many valets yell at me, 'NOOOO!!!!!'. Then I have like 5 managers of the sidewalk tell me, reverse! Yeah bro, I am gonna reverse my big ass Camry into one of the busiest streets full of people with lawyers on retainer, Robertson Blvd. That's what I am gonna do. Anyhoo, once the LAPD got involved - I swear, only in LA does the LAPD get involved with a car pulling legally into a driveway - I pulled out right quick, and drove around the block. Now this experience would seem totally fine and I'd have nothing to blog about, but you know me. So the forces of good and evil get together and somehow, my already short skirt gets shorter and creeps itself up while i am in the car. No harm, no foul. I am in my car and doing all right. Well all ain't well and good when I turn that corner and pull up to the valet. All I know is pulling up, the valet's eyes would not leave my crotch area. Curious to see why the f*(% this creep won't focus on where my eyes are, I look down and say, 'For F*(% sake.' Totally an unnecessary Britney moment. At least I am not famous enough to have photographers flash at my crotch when this mistake happens.

Now did I mention my inability to walk in 5 inch heels, the same 5 inch heels most women covet and line up at stores to suffer for? Well this flatfooted little asian sister says 'Hells no!'. So what does it feel like to enter a red carpet and have some dude announce who you are and have the photographers snap many pictures of you?

If my brain was able to stay a working organ and remember, I would tell you, but literally, all those photographers, like 5000 of them (and my 5000 I mean 3 and when I say 3, I mean like 30), are all calling my name CORRECTLY!!!!! and telling me, cross your legs, uncross your legs, look over your shoulder, second level, up here. The experience was soooo crazy, I literally think I blacked out and my brain threatened to walk out on me. Luckily, I said to my brain 'okay, truce' and it came back to me. But not without a good beating to let me know who is boss. My brain's a jerk.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

New Show!

Hello friends! Guess what? I just got the position of coorespondent for CW NOW, The CW's new weekly 30 minute show about the hottest trends in tech, fashion, beauty, and all things lifestyle. It is so exciting! We shot our first show last week and it shows every Sunday night at 7 pm.

This week I am covering the new 'baby food diet.' I swear, it's pretty delicious...something I didn't expect since anyone with a tongue knows baby food tastes like flavorless mushy poop. Maybe constantly eating this mess is the main reason behind our inabilities to remember our childhoods, hmmm???? We're trying to block out the horrible memories of brown crap that is pushed into our mouths by adults waving around a spoon always make a stupid propeller sound. We should commission a study.

Anyhow, the story will be a lot of fun and goes over nutrients of this delicious new way of eating that is sweeping the hollywood hotlist.

Now the show is really flashy and fun. Everyone tune in if you get a chance. We even discuss tech, which I am itching to kick some ass with! You know I wanna get down and dirty with HD on the cheap!

So watch this Sunday. More silliness to come. Promise, but as of now the little wrinkled buddy aka brain is about to run out on me.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007


You know the old saying, 'if something can go wrong, it will.'? Well lemme tell you a little ditty. One day, Chi-Lan wakes up and decides to go to Cancun with a bunch of girlfriends. yeah. Everyone is happy and plans are made.

Enter Hurricane Dean. Well, with a hurricane on the horizon, many Mexicans are bracing for a natural disaster, the govenor of Quintana Roo asks that no one enter the region, and empty planes be sent to evacuate stranded tourists. Wow. That's a lot to take in 20 hours before departure. Needless to say, we cancel our trip.

Rewind 2 weeks. Being a prepared traveler, I decide that with so many wonderful opportunities to play into the water, I don't want to have to deal with the hassle of glasses nor contacts. And since 2 other of the girls got Lasik before the trip, I decide to 'get work done' as well.

So I choose this crazy good and expensive doctor in Beverly Hills, because, dude, you only have the two eyes to work with. You can't mess around. And since this guy has worked on some of the Lakers, I thought, yeah, I am in good hands. After many meetings and doctor's office visits, I come to learn that Dr. Andrew Caster is a very conservative doctor, which puts me even more at ease.

Well, it turns out that I have weak corneas and have to have RPK aka Advanced Surface Treatment, it's the other lasik. Oy, fine fine. If i move forward with this method, healing time increases to about a week, and I will have to deal with blurry vision for a week while all my lively cells grow back. However, I am assured that the results are the same in the end. Ok, let's rock and roll.

So being a curious nelly, while waiting for an hour in the chair with all these tests being run on me, I walk out to see another girl is being brought into the procedure room. And being an advanced lasik center, they show the entire procedure on a 20" monitor. But the size of the monitor is not important, what is important is that there I am, standing thinking, well I am going to be doing this soon, so why not take a look at what happens. And lemme tell you, there is nothing I have ever learned in school, the streets, rap videos, or from the secret decoder rings outta cereal boxes that could have prepared me for the horror of seeing someone's humongoid eyeball being kept open ala A CLOCKWORK ORANGE. I screamed with my inside voice and ran into my exam room.

As soon as someone in some scrubs walked by my semi-opened door, I screamed, where is the XANAX!!!!!! I, obviously, had caught a slight case of the jitters. After almost clawing my nails through the quality vinyl all office chairs are covered in, the nurse enters the room, and effectively draws a milk mustache on my face - out of chloroform. I got my Xanax! In less than 15 minutes, she said I was doing fine, moving slow, like a tortoise who had found a reason to move to the other end of the grass. I thought I was fast, but reality's wind resistance showed otherwise.

So somehow, totally unbeknownst to me, I make it into the procedure room. I remember a teddy bear being thrust into my arms, the same teddy bear that other girl who was just operated on had in her arms. And all I could think was, 'how many others, Teddy, how many others have had the 'pleasure' of holding your ass! You disgust me.' It turns out that drugs don't muffle my crazy meanness. Good to know.

Anyhow, all I remember is the doctor saying, 'now look straight into the laser and don't move'. But you know what? I don't remember moving because i remember thinking, 'I need to sleep. Totally sleepy. What's that smell? Are they burning my hair? OMG it's my eyeball. Don't move. They'll take out an eyelid. Oh I need to shut my eyes. Sooooo sleepy.'

Then like a rock star, I wobble out of the procedure room, and am given many medications for the next day and week, including a sexy pair of sleeping goggles, you know the kind, they look like you're going to go swimming....but instead of just being a sexy pair of sport goggles with clear lenses, you also have that coveted head wrap, and most importantly, medical tape to tape the stupid thing onto your face in an 'x'. Wow, is it hot in here, or is it just my goggled and taped up face? I am telling you, if the sexy police were on duty, they'd have to take me in.

Anyhow, long story short, not like I can really save it at this point, I did all the drops, ate all the meds, and taped my face many times. And a word to the wise, small pieces will do because that stuff leaves residue that sticks dirt and bugs to your face and makes you look homeless. At least that's what I have been told. Ok so however many weeks after my eyes are supposed to be semi-healed and I don't need to wear contacts (yeah!) or glasses (yeah!) I get told I need to wear glasses when I drive. WHHHHHAAAAAA??????? WTF?

That's right you all, out of the 14,000 procedures done by this office, and out of the thousands performed by this high-end advanced laser, for some reason, my eyes got 'Under corrected.' I am the 2nd case of this amazingness. Oh yeah! That vision is not perfect! It's fuzzy. I need to wear glasses. And now I have to have the operation AGAIN! in two months! GAWD.

Now to come full circle, when something in my life can go wrong, I swear that it will.

Friday, July 20, 2007

IKEA food plus Bourne Ultimatum

I don't know why I always think this is a good idea, but everytime I go to IKEA, I end up in their cafeteria/restaurant coveting their delicious array of Swedish and American food. They have such amazing offerings like shrimp salad for $3.99 and Veggie Lasagne with side for $3.99. And then there are the side offerings of delicious heart attacks such as curly fries, mac n' cheese, and grilled cheese. Well needless to say, after ordering curly fries on my last visit, and being allowed to sample the mac n' cheese, I have been eagerly awaiting my next trip to Sweden in America hit that cheesiness up! And yesterday I did! World, I will conquer you afterall!

Ok, so I order this mac n' cheese, and being in a hurry, I ask for it to go so I may walk around IKEA eating their food. And instead of walking and 'taking care of business' in the store like I planned, I instead, end up munching a couple bites of food in three separate living rooms, actually enjoying their display livingrooms as if they were my own, feet up, food out, and leaning back like a cholo. Sure my elbows weren't up, but they were moving from side to side.

Now IKEA food is pretty all right for being in a furniture store and costing pennies on the dollar (do they import the food from child laborers in China?), but man, eating that much mac n' cheese with nothing else almost killed me. And that, my friends, was how I spent my Thursday afternoon.

Now to the evening portion of the program, cause you know that's when I let loose and get crazy! That's right! Movie time! I saw the Bourne Ultimatum and was honestly soooo impressed! It was really loud in the theater, to fully submerse you into the chase scenes - and there were aplenty! This is the third in the spy trilogy which began with Bourne Identity and continued with Bourne Supremacy. And may I just say, the Bourne Ultimatum totally doesn't disappoint when it comes to action and excitement! This movie was pretty hot. From chase scenes on foot to car, the action was non-stop and really fun. When previously Jason Bourne was asking, 'Who am I', and the second one 'Who killed my girlfriend and who wants to kill me', the third is more revealing. Jason Bourne comes home to discover who he is, and how he got to be the way he is now. The story delivers, but the action is totally where it is at for this movie goer. The film had fun plot twists, amazing superhuman action, and awesome stunts. This one is totally worth the $15 at the movie theater.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Yahoo! project and more

Hello one and probably one reader!

How are you doing? Well I have been incredibly busy working here and there, but mainly focusing on spending time with my family. You see, I have a very close knit family and my grandmother has decided to move up to Denver - and that move is taking place tomorrow. So I have been hanging out at her home 9 hours a day for the last week or so. I am trying to get in as much grandmother love as possible. :)

and in the midst of all this family stuff, I forgot to announce my latest special on HGTV, 'Hot Grills, Cool Patios 2007'! It premiered this Sunday, and I am sure it will replay for you to tivo. It was at this convention that I got EXTREMELY ill, like death bed ill with the 'Reno Stomach Flu' as the ER doctor so kindly called it, that not only comes with all the sumptuous symptoms of the flu such as the night sweats, menopause heat flashes, loss of appetite, inability to focus and talk, sore throat, runny nose, congestion that could block a semi from passing on the freeway, but it also comes with a dose of nausea and diarrhea, the latter of which, I am proud to say, never hit me. If there is one adjective out there that describes me, it's KLASSy, people, klassy.

So the funny thing is I just remember being so ill on that shoot. All i can remember is not being able to hold sentences nor thoughts together, let alone string together words to form actual intelligible sentences, but there I am, on TV, looking and sounding all right. Unless you know me extremely well, my voice sounds pretty clear when it needed to be. Not to shabby master producers and editors on the show. Not too shabby.

Anyhow, I just completed a little video for Yahoo! Videogames where I take you inside the ultra-exclusive VIP launch event for the highly anticipated Madden 08 videogame. Man up boys, it's time to get your game on. Ooh rah.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

a quickie

ok, so I only have enough time for a quickie post. Moose, my little 2 oz dog is such a thug gangster, I swear, if he were human, he's be spending all summer at Magic Mountain throwing gang signs.

Fed Ex came again today and all the little dude does is bark so much! he's terrorized the delivery guy so much, he just throws the boxes at the doorstep and leaves. I usually see smoke trails by my door, that's how i know he was there.

But I love Moose more than anything.

And I am meeting up with old Tech TVer Martin Sargent today. Yeah! it'll be fun to catch up. I'll let you know how it goes.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

New version of old bluetooth headset

You know what sucks? That I am deaf in an ear. Usually I am all right with that but today, well it bites just a bit more.

Motorola just released a newer version of their MotoBlue bluetooth headset and it is now called the Motorola MiniBlue. I think their last version had issues with ear wax build-up. I am not sure if that is really a Motorola issue as much as it is a user issue (clean yer ears!). Ok, it is a Motorola issue, so I hope that this new version of the hyped bluetooth headset that literally fits into your ear like an earbud, and performs WITHOUT the little microphone jutting into your cheek, fixes that issue.

Now since it fits into your ear, it's pretty discreet, which is nice. And since it sits in the ear like an earbud, the headset actually blocks out ambient noise, making the calls clearer. And since no one's ear is the same, they provide ear tips to create a unique seal (doesn't that just sound weird, like they're boxing your ears with this thing? Just me? huh.) Anyhoo, it also has a range of 33 feet. And since it has no mic jutting out to transmit the sounds eminating from your pie hole to the other end, the headset probably transmits the vibrations from the inner ear to the other side. Don't even ask me how that works, but it does. With about 7.5 hours of talk time, about 500 hours of standby time, and weighing about 7,5 ounces, this little dude could be a mainstay in the ol' noggin for one or 1000 of you.

For myself, even though it is ultra small and discreet, all which I love, I know the minute I slip this into my pocket, I will forget it, then end up washing it and destroying it. Plus if it ever made it into the black hole abyss I call my purse, well, that will be the last time i see it. Plus the whole being deaf in an ear doesn't really make this a favorable device, since it plugs up the ONE AND ONLY working ear I have. Sure calls may come through crystal clear, but I won't hear any noise, including the bicyclists riding by, ringing their little bells at me to move, then they'll crash into me, I'll fall, break a pelvis, then where will I be? On a street somewhere, tangled with a bicyclist, clothes torn, pelvises broken, hair disheveled...wait, is it getting hot in here? Wasn't i writing about a bluetooth headset?

anyhow, $150 buys you one of these little doodads. And if you work hard enough, you too can get mangled and tangled with a sexy bicyclist on the street thanks to Motorola's new MiniBlue. Peace out sexy bastards!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

this world is wack

OK, there are a couple of crazy things i have been meaning to mention on this blog, and i am sure you all have noticed it and are up in arms - outrage of a thousand fire hoses, if you will.

1. new fashion fad of pregnant shirts and dresses - now i cannot for the life of me understand why my shopping in Europe pretty much just consisted of me getting angry and silently waving my fist of fury at each store because all they stock currently are tops and dresses that are soooo full at the bust and bottom, they could fit the belly of a sextuplet mom-to-be whose fetuses are carrying their own twins. How can wearing parachutes on a daily basis look that appealing? I guess the hot weather works well with loose fitting clothing, but come on! So what do I do? I buy myself a green mu mu that would make many a man loving Al Bundy's mu mu jealous.

2. Fashion fad that almost blinded me - shortalls and overalls. OMG, can someone please tell me why fashion keeps trying to resurrect one of the worst fads of all time, pants and shorts with bibs for ADULTS? On children, these garments are ultra cute, but for the adults of the world, why are we trying to push the public's dependence on denim bibs, connected to pants? Sure the bibs and straps help hold those baggy pants up, but is there a belt phobia i am unaware of? If you're working in the yard or farm or car, sure, go ahead and jump in an overall or 2. if you're not, jump off a cliff cause you don't wanna know what'll happen if i see you walking down the street trying to 'bring back the shortall!' I will lose my sh*t. Hugs!

3. Our people seem to be devolving - or at least a certain woman who goes to the gym on Saturday afternoons is...
Tell me wonderful people, how can a woman think it's A OK to highlight her hair in the shared women's locker room at the local 24 hour fitness? I, an unsuspecting hand washer walk up to the sink at the gym this afternoon, am overtaken by an odd chemical smell. I look to my right towards the stalls, but before my eyes can fully whip the 90 degrees over, they are stopped, no stunted in movement, by an older woman...wearing only a towel...on her bottom half...with arms up...using a plastic squirt bottle to inject store bought hair dye into her roots. I don't know what shocked me more, the fact that her way large aureola breasts were hanging out loud and proud while she was maneuvering her youthful new hair color in and out of her roots, or if it was that I didn't recognize the name on the box of brown dye she had sitting right on the sink edge. Now if you'll indulge me, not like you haven't by letting me rant, I must give you some background on this gym. It is the only open 24-hours gym in the neighborhood, and honestly doesn't have the best nor newest equipment, but traffic going that way is pretty good, so i usually hit it when I am in the area. Today, I was in the area and around the aureola. Do I need to put up a sign that says, DON'T DYE HAIR IN SINK? I thought it was common gym etiquette.

and that is it for today.

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Griffith Park Fire

Hi all, I know some of you are aware that I live in Los Feliz, just south of the base of Griffith Park.

As you probably have heard, the fire has ravished abut 300 acres of historic Griffith Park. The flames have not touched my place, and though the homes 2 block away have been evacuated, we think that the fire will not be able to jump the main road, Los Feliz Blvd.. There was smoke that entered our home, but we are all safe and Moose, my dog, is all right. We have the AC on and are keeping fans running to get the smoke moving and hopefully out of our home. It is intense to look up out of our balcony and see an orange sky....but we know that the firefighters are doing all they can to contain the fire. It's really sad. I was concerned all day, but with the evening settling in and making firefighting so much more difficult, I am at a loss for words.

and with that, I say thanks for all your concern.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Leaving for vacation!!!

Now you all know my screws are a little loose up there in the noggin, and let me tell you, I have been stressing out due to 1) my trip and leaving for 9 days and 2) tax deadline.

Now although my Monday was pretty successful, can I just say I was sweating all weekend long because I needed to open up a SEP IRA (a retirement account for self-employed people - plus I said I would put money into so I can reap some tax benefits) in my taxes. and since my return was completed in early April, I thought, oh, no problem! I will get that opened and fund that puppy quick-like. And in true Chi-Lan form, somehow I picked the slowest company to open an account with and BOOM! Like lightening hitting metal rods and melting sand into glass in 'Sweet Home Alabama', I am scrambling like crazy last night to OPEN this account. Got it open, now funding it electronically is not allowed, so I pop my silly butt into the car at 10 pm, sister and Moose in tow, and we drive 20 minutes to drop off an envelope that will hopefully show the IRS that I am not a liar, and I really did contribute to my retirement. YEAH!

I also started packing for my lovely trip to Germany yesterday because today has like 3 minutes free, and I'd rather be blogging than packing. Lucky for me, I have no qualms about packing like a 9 year old child, so i went into my closet, picked the tops I wanted, put two hands up, palms facing each other, closed in on the chosen 'winners', walked the clothes on hangers to the suitcase, and released. Voila! Packed! Now when I unpack, sure it'll take just a hair more effort, but I envision the night to be like this: open suitcase, grab hangers, move to closet, and hit the sack. Genius! If you don't worry about wrinkles or carrying on the pretense of adulthood, then this is the packing strategy for you!

Now if there was only a gadget that would make packing easier than this...

Friday, April 13, 2007

No jury duty?!

OMG! Can you believe that I didn't get called in to see either Judge LAnce Ito nor Diane Sawyer's faces telling me that I am providing a great service to my community? Well, I did complete a service. I like to call it 'disgruntled brat of LA county.' Others may regard it as a shining sliver of service in an otherwise overcast and bleak world, overrun with mongrels out to eat only bones and bread. Why bread? Why not ask, why mongrels? Hmmmm.....discuss.

So it is Friday and I have been home writing scripts all day long. Let me tell you, after a crazy windstorm blew through LA and knocked down many a power line in LA, it's odd that the next day, the day I choose to stay home and work, is absolutely GORGEOUS! The sun shines, it's warm, and my dog Moose, gets outside to kick some jogger ass. Did I mention he's aggressive and a chihuahua? I like to call him BM for Big Moose or Bowel Movement. You decide.

So what is my insanely attention deficit disorder mind fixated on for these next few seconds? Grindhouse of course! Can I just tell you that when I heard about the over 3 hour long film, I thought, crap. Last time I saw a movie that broke the 3 hour mark was Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. Though it was spellbindingly beautiful and an awesome flick, by the 2.5 hour, I started trying to stretch in my chair, and by the end of the movie, i had forgotten how to walk and how to pee. Old age is getting to me. That reminds me, my birthday is soon...April 20th.

So back to Grindhouse, what do i think? I think Tarantino's film 'Death Proof' is a lot better than Rodriguez's. Now granted, Rodriguez created a straight homage to the B zombie movies of yesteryear, but at the same time, when you have two flicks side by side, you have to be able to compare and contrast. And i liked Tarantino's because of the action, dialogue and twists! Now Rodriguez did have some silly funny dialogue moments, and Freddy and Rose did great jobs as the leads in the film, but still...At one point, I got up to get more popcorn.

Is 'Grindhouse' worth $11.75 to see? Well, personally, I don't think you lose anything by seeing it on TV, so you can wait for the video. But if you can find an $8 movie theater, man up, grab your wallet, insert your catheter and get ready to get grossed out and laugh.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Jury Duty

And did I tell you all that I am on jury duty? That's right! an entire week of nothing to do but wait for a recording to tell me if I need to report so I may do my part for society by paying it forward through our judicial system.

And I have made it as far as Thursday without having to go in. Last couple times this happened, I get called in on Friday and sit there, doing absolutely nothing. GAWD! But I did get a 'pep' talk by Judge Lance Ito. yes! the OJ Simpson Judge Ito talked to my group of 400 or so disgruntled citizens who are more interested in being released than serving on a jury. Honestly, I would not mind serving, except many cases last two weeks or more, and being a freelancer, the $15 jury service pays won't really pay for the mortgage if I don't work. :(


Monday, April 09, 2007

more projects on the horizon!

You know what I think is totally odd? Every time I walk to the post office, dry cleaners, or anywhere in my neighborhood in fact, there are soooo many people milling about. Don't they have jobs? Or are they all semi-employed like me? We all know I mill around a lot as well, walking that Kujo dog of mine, running my errands, and waiting to be called for jury duty. Yeah!

I have a couple of projects that will be hitting the air in April. They are both on HGTV. One is 'RV Road Home', which started out as an RV themed project, all about the really cool gadgets in RVs. But it morphed into a show about family fun. It was such a fun shoot though, and being from southern California and always thinking of seeing the country on wheels, with a take-along bathroom, I love the idea of an RV. This premiered last night at 9 pm, but there are 4 episodes, so keep your eyes peeled.

I will also host HGTV's Outdoor Living Special 2007 which premieres April 22 at 9 pm. I love being in primetime! For this show, my co-host, Evan Farmer and I crazy through the Las Vegas Convention center to being you all the cool stuff to make your outdoor area sing- but only public domain songs because no one can afford publishing rights nowadays.

And supposedly tonight is the one-time showing of my interstitials, my first foray into kind of acting with AMC's Date Night event and the movie 'Splash', starring Tom Hanks and Darryl Hannah. Yeah, I have to say that I went in to this project as a host, and came out feeling dirty, the kind of dirt a shower and loofah can not match. So I have decided to call it an 'acting' project where the producers forgot to tell me I'd be acting, and did the best job I could. Can I just tell you all that I shot this a little less than a month ago and it went like this:

My agent calls with the good news that I booked this gig. I am told that I will be the host of a dating show, the moderator, if you will, of the conversations being had by those there to date each other. I cancel my vacation to Germany and go for the first day of a 2 day shoot. I get to the set and meet everyone. I am suspicious as there are 4 dudes and me for the afternoon shoot for Splash. Spidey senses tell me something is up. For some god-forsaken-reason, I think I am a DATER, a person there to pick a date! I call my agent and leave a message. Then I man up and do the shoot, trying to pull my strength from the core of the earth to not piss myself off too much for getting swindled.

The next day, my agent calls and says I am the host, not a dater. He has even verified this with the producer. So I take it upon myself to edumakate him on how there are 4 dudes, and me. And the producers have asked me to choose one. I told them I didn't want to choose one, I didn't want any of them. Or I could pretend these men turned me into a lover of women and I would out myself on TV that afternoon. Think of the drama. both these ideas were dismissed and I hated the project, but I finished it with as much professionalism as I could. I hear it turned out well, but I have to say this project was one of the worst experiences of my career. It has been a while since I have felt so disrespected and disregarded as I did with this one, but oh well. I did my job and that is all I can do. I'll know better for next time!

But some good news! I may have a new show on the horizon! I won't jinx it, but let me tell you, I am sooo excited about it!

Friday, February 23, 2007

Life's a crazy ride

Hello all you fun friends.

So life has been passing by at a really fast pace and before I know it, it's the 4705, Year of the Boar.

Well here's the skinny of what's been happening. My sister/roommate and I have been working hard on learning how to have a dog, my new pooch, Moose. And we have been getting through the holidays with the family. I have to say, being a part of a Chinese family that really doesn't celebrate Christmas is a good one.

So good news...I have since hosted a CES special for HGTV. I have been shooting new episodes of 'I Want That Tech Toys' and been working hard shooting 'The Bog Tease' on Reelz Channel. Good times. I have also shot 'Outdoor Living Expo' which will premiere June 9th - I think...

And now the bad news...HGTV's 'I Want That Tech Toys' has now been cancelled. We will be shooting our last episode in June and that's all. Such a shame. I guess HGTV saw tech stuff as too far of a stretch from their home base, but I have to say, it is nice that they gave it a go.
Now off to find some new stuff.
Don't forget to marvel at how awesomely cute my dog Moose is. I am the most horribly proud dog parent now. I am my own worst enemy.