Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Bedroom gadgets

So I am sure you all know my show starts tomorrow!!!! And now I am the proud owner of a host bio on HGTV.

Now my friends, if you weren't able to catch my 1st appearance on THE VIEW, these are the products that I was introduced to Monday morning, and delivered a segment on Monday noontime. yes, it was that fast and exciting.

So let's just get it out there. We all have tech in our bedrooms and I don't mean you good ol' rabbit (call me). This is network TV, so I will be showing you network TV safe tech. And since I didn't get the chance to choose the gadgets, well, I get to punch a couple of these products in their ovaries or testes. They make good punching bags.

Now for the first product I talked about called The Snore Stopper ($60). This thing was wicked weird. But I guess if you snore like a horse this could be majorly helpful to your mate. You strap this weird little box onto your wrist using this wristband, and it's a little weird because on the back of the box, there are these little gel pads that are supposed to sit flat on your wrist. Now why would you need little gel pads? Because this bad boy sends electric shocks to your body to punish you for working for the devil. We all know snorers are devil spawn. And that's my story, I'm sticking to it. The device does send pulses to the body, like a nudge to get you to shift your sleeping position and hopefully stop snoring. Does it work? Well I felt the little shocks on my wrist and it was kinda funny and creepy all at the same time. I had that same feeling when watching Children of The Corn. OMG! Children of the Corn made this device to send their spirits into our bodies! Yes! I see it now.

Another 'tech' product The View was hot and bothered about were Bright Feet Slippers ($40). In a nutshell, they are nightlights for your feet. Since there are little LED lights at the tip of the show that light up when you walk in them, they are really good for the latenight visit to the bathroom or kitchen. And with a light sensor at the side of the slipper, the light knows not to turn on during daylight. It's a smart slipper. Crazy! And for $40, well this slipper better have the IQ of a MENSA member. The ladies in the audience LOVED this slipper. For me, I'd rather spend $40 on iTunes downloads.

Next up: Double Up For Beds ($180). NO.

And if you're an extravagant outdoor partier who hangs with the hollywood or hamptons homeboys, well a party wouldn't be complete without this Outdoor Canopy Bed ($7280) that costs around as much as the GDP of many 3rd world countries.

And this last product, the Seura TV Mirror costs more than a salary I have ever made (go TV career!) (starts at $10,000) but is a neat little device. Now we all have TVs in our bedrooms, but who likes looking at a black box in the bedroom? Not I! So why not put a Sharp LCD into your mirror so when you aren't watching TV, the mirror is a mirror? And when you want to watch TV, well you get a pretty crisp TV image. However, one problem I noticed besides the hideous mirror frame, is the reaction time to turn this puppy on. I haven't ever experienced lagtime this long on a TV monitor before and do not know if it is related to SEURA's products, but considering you're paying that much money, well, a TV should turn on when you want it to...But don't worry about the frame problem i mentioned earlier, they have other choices and screens from 15"-42", so you guys are all set to purchase. Now go, consume!

And on August 18th, my next THE VIEW appearance will air. It has been pushed to coincide more with Back-to-school as I discuss Dorm Room Gadgets.

And don't forget to watch I WANT THAT! TECH TOYS premiering tomorrow night on HGTV!

PS. Chappelle Show is no good without Chappelle.