Sunday, December 09, 2007

For some reason, the paint never stopped flowing

I swear to god, this Friday and Saturday I helped my mom paint her bedroom and then trim and touch-ups Saturday. Now this is on top of the weekend from painting hell and an additional weekend of painting more stuff, including the chairs, shrubs, flowers, rails, tiles, nails, cough medicine bottles, aspirin, and anything else that can be primed. GAWD! It has gotten to the sad point where I spend most all my free time at Lowes or Home Depot getting materials during the work week only to look oh so forward to glory of the painting weekend. I've convinced myself all this painting is cardio and can stand in for the gym. No bones about it!

Anyhow, has anyone evcer gotten such a bad case of the cankles your shoes don't fit on your feet any longer? Well it happened to me. If I were in the Family Guy episode where Bill Clinton takes his harem of large ladies out on the town, my canckles would woo Clinton so bad, he'd forget all about those 20 year old interns. So because I can't stand being awake and for about 14 hours on a plane in coach, I decided to take matters in my own hands and take a sleeping pill to make them hours just fly away. And fly they did, but as they flew, they somehow inserted about 10 gallons of water into my ankles. This is how it happened. I wake up after sleeping for a good 6-7 hours. I try and insert my 'hmmm my ankles look a little puffy and unusual' feet into my sandles. Let's just say that I wasn't able to shove my feet into my sandles to make it to the bathroom. Even with grease, these whales would not have made it into these shoes. So what do I do? I end up going to the bathroom in socks - no hard soles. And the first thing I do when I get into the bathroom? Look for sprinkles, and I ain't talking about cupcakes.

So Thailand was amazing. What did I do for the wonderous three days? Well the most important thing to know is once I found out that massages are all of $6, I got as many as I possibly could. And I scored 4 of them! bravo Chi-Lan. Ok, so we shot for the first two days non-stop, talking about all the fun things Thailand had to offer, then off to Ko Pha Ngan for the Full Moon Party (insert drum and bass music here). And that party was sooo great! I didn't get to enjoy much of it honestly because I had to work - a lot - but I did get enough time to dance with some guys I met that are from Las Vegas, explore some of the drink stands and walk down the beach. Great! Can I just say that I love the fact that as kids on the beach, we play non-stop with pails. Well at the biggest beach party in the world in Thailand, adults drink their juice out of the pails. How crazy is it to see all these adults, a few of whom are shirtless (thank you big guy in the sky), carrying around little alcoholic buckets with colorfull bendy straws. And there was even this one Irish lad who saw the simple problem of holding these little pails and walking, not being able to easily being able to sip, so he connected 5 bendy straws to be able to walk and lounge but always have the straw right in tongue reach. I guess bending the elbow to bring the bucket o' alcohol would be too much work.

And now I can get down to business. Baja Fresh. Now I am a huge fan of Mexican food, and really do like to eat Baja even if it isn't real Mexican. But hey, it's good. Or at least I thought. Baja, you bitch. you have wronged the wrong girl. so I have eaten twice at Baja recently, ready to partake in the fine dining that is adulterated mexican in california. Little did I realize that I would be paying for the solidified diareehea (yes I am a word smith) that is coming from my once loved chain restaurant. Now I know that this has all been 'to-go' orders but still. I ordered a tostada without chicken, because, well I don't eat meat. So what do I get? i get a tostada, and no, I didn't add chicken. What do I get instead? I get a tostada, but what are those little bits of white thready sh*%? Wow, chicken. And all the wonderful Baja dude did was slap some chicken into the dish, realize it isn't supposed to have chicken and like a responsible and sensible man, the just takes the chicken off. Great dude. Thanks ot you and your mom for raising you. I can see her efforts were not wasted on just a bag of skin. So last week I decide to give my old Baja another go at winning back my heart with an order of my usual salad and what do I get? Well as a friend who saw my salad said, 'what the f*ck is that? There's only lettuce.' Yup, my salad only had lettuce. I am not sure what happened to the beans, rice, cheese, dressing, etc., but I did specifically taste teh bitterness of life wielded into the plastic container by a short order cook that really hates the world who can't order meat thrown haphazardly into a tortilla. That's it. I don't want to live in a world where I can't get a good tostada. But then again, I think I should just stop going to Baja Fresh. Make me waste $6 once Baja, shame on you, make me waste $12, shame on me. You guys been feeling all that rain? It's god crying because Baja sucks so bad.

2 comments:

Brent said...

I'm glad you had fun in the land of Thai.... That part of the world is a blast.

Hmmm your ankles are too big... maybe you're... never mind.

mikepittenger said...

I would hardly call your feet "whales". No matter how swollen they could get.

I am glad you had a good time, if I ever go I heard golf is cheap so that is where I will go.

See you on the CW