Monday, February 28, 2005

Crotches Across America

Thank you all for the support with my E! Entertainment appearance. I had a ball! It's weird because a daily show is pretty hectic, but their 9 hour live telecast was organized down to the minute. I was impressed when they came up to me and said, 'you're now on at 12:06, not 12:05.' It would have been interesting to see what they would have done had I gone CRAZY and screamed, 'Pushed one minute? you think I'm made of time? That's it. I'm outta here!' Then left the room chanting some Wicken spell-in a gown, and heels, with a PR person and products in tow.

Seriously, it was awesome; now all I have to do is have someone really like me E! and voila! I get to do more product segments on BASIC cable! ;)

You guys are so full of creative ideas, I want to throw something out there for you to nibble on. This Thursday, I am shooting a segment called 'Crotches Across America'. In this segment, I will spoof a human interest news story where I interview people from all walks of life, while showing off an LCD belt buckle that flashes whatever you want to put in there. Here's where you come in.

If you are interested in sharing your ideas for the 'people' across America that you would find interesting wearing this LCD belt buckle, write them in. They can be general or specific, and I will do the rest. I thought it would be fun to include you guys in one of my pieces, and this is one way I thought of. I hope you don't mind...and if you do, well I can tell you how to get down with cat butt soup.


Brent said...

Wow an LCD Belt Buckle... hmmm that sounds wacky enough to work. Here are some of my idea's

1: Sanitized for your protection.
2: If you can't be good. I'm safe.
3: Objects appear larger than they actually are.
4: Quit looking down here and talk to me.
5: Your eyes are not playing tricks on you but I will.
6: Now ask me where the batteries are.
7: Home of the Whopper.
8: Is my fly open?
9: Go Away.
10: Kiss me I'm Irish

I watched and watched and watched Chi-Lan and I never saw you.... I was a TiVoing fool!!!!!!

Thaman said...
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CBSpaceCowboy said...

Very nice brent, you thought of alot of good ones. but what about pics? Will it flash pics? but I guess you cold have it flash something like "I know you are looking at my crotch", "pervert!", "Go to Hell", or "How about you come back to my place?" Those would be good.

Brent said...

See what fast fingers and coffee can do... how about

11: iCod
13: I'd like you to meet my little friend!!
14: Talk to the hand
15: Why yes, I am just happy to see you.

Thaman said...
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Thaman said...

11: May cause drouziness.
12: Wipe the drool off your face.
13: Do you have an eye problem?
14: Pay attention!!!!!

Thaman said...

This on is more for an animated buckle:
Belt will self-destruct in 5,4,3,2,1. BANG!!!

Unicronz said...

This area under construction

Bioharzard zone

pull handle to receive lotion

secret to your happiness below

if youre a guy you shouldnt be reading this

If you need any others let me know. btw if you could post up some pics from your oscar appearance thatd be great because I didnt get to see it. and you looed pretty hott in your segment today not to say you dont look great in your glasses but without you could see your face better. wicked hott mama.

Unicronz said...
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Naked Snake said...

Well, I can only think of acouple right now...

- If you can read this then you are to close to me.

-Smile!!! You're on candid camera.

-This is the only kind of flashing I do on tv.

-Did you see me on E! last Sunday.

Jason aka Dark Magician 25 said...

Im sure you wont be able to use any of these but here goes.

1) Look Up
2) Hey she is talking to you.
3) Mine is better than yours
4) Did you see me on E!!!
5) Ask me about my ticklish feet (sorry couldnt resist)
6) Hi my name is....(instert name here)
7) Dont even ask how i typed this in.
8) Its getting hot in here
9) I'm blogging this
10) All your belt buckles are belong to us.

fred said...

How about:
"Chi-lan was here"

yam said...

OK, here a few off the top of my head:

- Yes, I am an American Idol!
- Simon Cowell sucks!
- I'm Chi-Lan Lieu and you're not!
- Fuggetaboutit!
- I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to love her (from Notting Hill)
- Don't hate me because I'm beautiful!
- I am the REAL star of the Screen Savers!

OK, I guess I won't quit my day job.


chinpokomon said...

Aww... I also missed Chi on E! Sunday, now I may never get to see her in a dress... please do post some screen caps...

Lemmie get this strait... so we're supposed to come up with something that will actually be shown on the LCD screen? Hmm, well I can't think of anything better than what was already posted (I know, a lot of help I am...).

Naked Snake said...

Thought of acouple more when I was delivery newspapers.

- Do you like what you see?

- Doesn't this look cooler than those huge gun belt buckles.

- Ain't this some cool high tech s***.

chinpokomon said...

- Cat butt soup.

I'm still trying to figure that out...

Brent said...

Chin I read it as "Cat Butt Soap" at first which actually makes sense in a weird twisted sort of way.

1: Good to the last drop
2: Slippery when wet
3: we plough deep while others sleep
4: ramming speed!!
5: abort, retry, fail

rickey24 said...

- Your name here.
- I was on E!, you weren't.
- Bacon, Nature's candy.
- You wish.
- Screw you guys, I'm goin' home!
- 2 Wycked

If you are doing another segment we might not get to find out about yet another on-line. The humanity!

Thaman said...
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Boss of Sad said...

This one will be best if it's a guy wearing the belt:

If you can read this... so could your mom!


Sorry I didn't get to see your segment on E! Sunday - had know idea you'd be on that early.

Naked Snake said...

-Say hello to my little friend.
-Here's Johnny!
-Do you have a dollar that I could borrow?

Naked Snake said...

-Do I have something in my teeth?
-I am Keyser Soze.

chilidawg said...

careful i bite jk hi chilan

HAL said...

An LCD belt buckle? Ha! You should build a whole belt! In fact, let me know and I'll build you one.

1. Scratch and sniff
2. 12"
3. watch it, you'll poke your eye out
4. Biohazard
5. Smile, your on candid camera
6. Free samples
7. your mileage may vary
8. If you can read this you are too close
9. AC/DC
10. pervert!